Some thing from someone unknown who was not I.. good wisdom though

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be (possibly your roommate, neighbor, co-worker, longest friend, lover, or even a complete stranger) but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.

Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Some people move our souls to dance.
They awaken us to new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom.
Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon.
They stay in our lives for awhile, leave footprints in our hearts,
and We are never, ever the same. 

And sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower, or heart. Everything happens for a reason, nothing happens by chance or by means of luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless. The people you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience help to create who you become.

Even the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones.

If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart. If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.

Make every day count!! Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people that you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself; it will be hard for others to believe in you.

You can make of your life anything you wish. Create your own life then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.

 -By.. Unknown

If I played a song on the jukebox

would you dance with me in the middle of waffle house?
I miss my boyfriend and my mom and my house and my bed and the beach.
I will have most of it soon but not for long and not my boyfriend unfortunately.
He made me smile today though.. not that it's unusual for him to do that, he always does but it was a reassuring happy today that made me smile.
I think deep in my heart( I know that weird) that we will be happily ever after some day. =)
Other things, I am trying to be happy about other things but stuff is stressing me out which sucks
I really need to get to Florida and start my job, I know that will help me feel better.
after my practical this week I know things will calm down as well, and even though I have to start packing again which should be stressful I think it will be relaxing.

That's all for now

<3 Be peaceful

Blog about nothin...

I did nothing today...
I suppose I was productive by apply for a couple scholarships- I use the word couple in the real sense of the word as that's about the amount I could find that I am eligible for.
Which let me just say this... I never go in trouble during school, my folks are not wealthy, my dad was in the marines, I am a first generation college student, I never had lower than a 3.5 GPA during high school, I worked my ass off to take my senior classes online, finished my culinary certificate along with graduated in the top 30% of my class, competed all the way to the national level for skills USA along with being the skills vice president, was in the national technical honor society, volunteered, and worked.
Why in the worlddddddddddd am I not eligible for some freakin scholarships? Is it just me or is that unfair? What more do you want from me?

anyways now that I got that rant of my chest..
I have like 27 days left here.. and cannot wait to go.. I need a job and money.. I am sick of being a poor college student..
I ate a peanut butter and jelly for breakfast and Ramen and a peanut butter and jelly for late lunch.. also some imitation Reese's puff in between.. with no milk.  Gotta love it.

lastly... Why can't teachers post their grades in a timely matter? it has been two weeks since I left my last class and grades are still not up I am almost finished with another block.. If I go into a 2nd block before that grade is put up I am gunna be upset. I understand teachers have so much more to do but.. honestly you teach one class a day most of the time maybe two but still.. we as students depend on that grade.

I am burnt out. I need a mental break. a CIA break. A cold weather break.

serious lastly... Why is there only orange juice in my fridge?? I don't even like orange juice that much.. and I could have sworn I left more than just orange juice in there.. guess that's what happens when you don't live alone.. nothing is ever how you left it is it?

<3 Be Peaceful even if I'm not.

Stress is filling my head.

I AM STRESSED PEOPLE!
I am broke and have crap to pay for.
I have mock practical this week and real practical next week. BAM double stress.
I need to do so many things in so little time with so little motivation.
I really need to take some of my own advice.. "I know it's a pain in the ass but it will be worth it."
ugh!
luckily only 4 weeks left of school and only one of those weeks is 5 days long.
That my friends is something to look forward to.
I am also looking forward to my mom coming up and driving back down. I miss her.
In the mean time and in between time.. I gotta get motivated and get the shit outta this place!
Full sails ahead.

<3 Be Peaceful

p.s. in update of my last blog... I still feel like I am being punished, just trying to turn the lemons into vodka or bud light.

p.s.s how many blogs do you think I can post before I accidentally name one the same as a previous?

why is this happening to meeeeeeeeeee?!

I just needed one more week.
one more is all I wanted, just help me get through this practical and I will be ok.
but no.
I honestly feel like I'm being punished
Why now???????
why does this have to happen to me.
can't I catch just one break?

Withdraw.

While talking to my Mother today she told me she was having withdraw from not being able to read new blogs..
As I ALWAYS listen to my Mother.. here I am.
Tomorrow and Friday I will be doing a mock practical in preparation or my actually 2nd term practical the following Thursday and Friday... then on to a new block.
I cannot believe I am already half way through this block seems like it is going extremely quick.
and the count down will soon be in the 20's.
Other news is.. well.. not much.
The lovely boyfriend got phone privileges so that has been the base of my entertainment the last few days.
It is supposed to rain tomorrow and Friday.. hopefully it will melt all of the dirty ugly snow.
I have been happier lately.. feeling more like myself.
Johnny law is looming over my head like a black cloud though.

Cant wait to start packing for extern! =D

<3 Be Peaceful

ugh

I hate feeling like I have to lie.
Have to lie about how I feel to keep myself a float.
I don't want to deal with what would happen if I told the truth.

I'm frustrated.

<3 Be peaceful

These are the days I'll never forget...

I am blogging from the floor of my hotel room in Columbus, GA.
With me are Tyler and my love.
and honestly I couldn't ask for anything more.
Even on our worst days, when I am deathly sick or he is vomming , I am still happier than any other time and it's all I want.
The feeling of loving someone and being loved back and being welcomed into that persons family is such an amazing feeling.
This feeling makes everything worth it, the loneliness, the no communication, the distance is nothing compared the the feeling I get in the pit of my stomach every time he smiles at me.
How did I get so lucky?
I am happy. =) nothing else matters


<3 Be Peaceful

Already?

Already over half way through February, could it be?
Could it be only 2.5 weeks until my Practical?
and only 5.5 until I go on extern?
These months are flying by and in retrospect the whole time I have been here has even though there are days that seem like they will never end.
The count down is now a mere 38 days.. I remember posting that I couldn't say the number because it was too many. =)
I am preparing and ready for the steps ahead of me.
Just wish I could share it..
But I will see him soon.. if only for a few hrs or days.. it is better than nothing.
10.10.10<3


<3 Be Peaceful and joyous

Happy Valentines Day.

Alone yet again on Valentines... Story of my life? pretty much.

But anyway had my first day of class with Chef Dieter Schorner.

He is really cool and I like the class so far..it's just a little slow going for me.

I wish I could just go in, put my head down, and get my work done.

The days go by so slowly when its demo and lecture after demo and lecture.

Don't get me wrong I like listening to the chefs and learning new things but sometimes I just want to get the work done.

Oh well.. I feel like these three weeks are going to flyyyyy by and before I know it I will be in individual pastries.

And I'm ready for the weekend adventure ahead of me.

Have a good Valentines day =D

<3 Be Peaceful

Organization.

I know personally in my life organization plays a big role. Then again maybe I'm a clean freak.

I like for everything to have its place, little clutter, and for it to be clean.

In my own room this is easy.. I put something some where and it stays there until I move it.

If I make a mess it either stays messy and is my own fault or I clean it.

and when I clean.. I CLEANN.

adjusting to these differences while living with two other people has been difficult for me I think.

and it made me realize these things about myself because prior I had no idea how much things being put away meant to me or how much the lack there of bothered me for that matter.(I blame a lot of this on my mother)

I guess I also think in this way because to me messy, un-organized, unclean, and cluttered reflects laziness or lack of care to me and I do not want to reflect any of that.

I just feel as though if the things around me, my belongs and so forth, are organized then I personally will be organized and a clutter free area will result in a clutter free mind.

and in turn a clutter free organized mind will result in success.

I wish I could build a wall so I don't have to stare at the mess with the urge to clean it.

Oh well..

<3 Be Peaceful.. and Organized.

Well, well, well...

Today began with a broken $100.00 straightener and coffee on my car windshield.
and ya know.. I was a little upset but then..
I realized that is what they want, they want me to crack
and I'm not going to.
But do not think for one second I will forget.
For everything you do you must remember there are repercussions.


Tomorrow is gunna be fabulous hangin out with two of my favorite people gettin dank food and shoppin for cheap.
You can't lose.

Friday will be the kicker.

Happy regardless of the middle school behavior surrounding me.

<3 Be Peaceful

get my foot in the door

Did pretty okay on my cookie practical today.. could have done better but I am happy..
Hopefully I will crank out these tarts tomorrow and get some better scores.
I got some good news today.. I might be able to observe a food stylist that is coming to style here at the CIA which would be super cool and then I could pick her brain and stuff.
Things are looking bright.. I'm gunna ride this wave all the way into March and out of Hyde Park.

<3 Be Peaceful

p.s. Happy Feburary 10th =D
Its a wonderful day to celebrate!

It will be time well spent.

The block is coming to a closing.. Tomorrow I have my cookie practical with my tart practical on the following day.
Monday I will start Basic and Classical cakes which is when I will have my 2nd term practical the "big deal" practical.
Which will make me only one class away from extern? oh my!
In between then and now, I will go on a adventure which I am extremely excited about.
and I feel like it was my grown up decision to make which feels good and I am glad my mother agreed with my decision{or is pretending to  ;)  }
ugh.. light at the end of the tunnel? I think so.

<3 Be Peaceful

The "what if's" getcha everytime.

I let my mind wander just a little to much sometimes.
and then I think about all the possibilities that would turn everything to.. for lack of a better word... Shit.
I try to be optimistic but with so many plan crushing no's lately it gets hard.
I just want to be on the road to the happily ever after stage already.
I just wanna go see my boo.
This school blows.

<3 Be Peaceful

Here we are again..

HELLO!
Today was a good day and tomorrow is Friday so it can only get better right?
Today in class I made granola bars.. pretty cool
and my partner and I also made brownies and pecan diamonds which were pretty cool as well.
What actaully made my day today came as a surprise of sorts.. I was washing my hands at the sink and Chef came and stood next to me.. not unsaul, he does tend to creep some times.. just to watch what you're doing. As I finished up washing my hands he said to me.. It's a pleasure having you in class.
Obviously I thanked him and told him I enjoyed taking his class which I do a great deal. He followed this up with "are you being sarcastic" per his usual joking manner..
But never the less, I felt that I had gotten a little recognition and it made me feel like I have been doing a good job.
I was happy .=)
To continue the happiness Ally and I went bowling she won the first game I won the second.. our usual give and take. lol We had fun and hopefully we will do it again soon.
The weekend is almost here AGAIN! feels like just yesterday it was Friday.. the weeks have flown by since we got back from Christmas break... Optimistic it won't stopp.
Also optimistic some good things will fall into place in the next few days..

The glass is always half full and where ever there is a will there is a way!

<3 Be Peaceful.

p.s. Mom, if you're reading this which.. I know you are and you better be.. I miss you a lot. I can't wait for you to come to NY. <33 Love you-Pookie

Blog number 100: May the Bridges I burn light the way.

Couldn't have said it better or picked a better day to realize or picked a better blog to express it.

I have been thinking a lot about what I actually WANT to do not what I could or should do and I have realized that I think food styling is what I really want to do. I get to play with food, cook it, touch it, arrange it, make it beautiful and appetizing, and then get its picture taken. Make the beauty last forever.
Whats not to love? it's the best of all things I like.
So..Last night I contacted a few food stylist in Florida in hopes of picking their brains a little and maybe finding my self a mentor.
I don't think I have ever even considered having a mentor ever before but I feel like right now it's the best way to get to what I want.
So out of the two I contacted one of them responded and hopefully I will be able to talk to her on Friday to get some information.

Today I accidentally stumbled upon something I guess I have had inside myself the whole time I just forget to remember it if that makes sense.

I have worked hard to get here, there are so many who would kill to be in my position, I have struggled in my own unique ways and maybe it's not the greatest right now, maybe it doesn't make me the happiest where I am currently but.. It's gunna get me to where I want to be, to where I willll be happy. 

You never know how strong you are until your strength is tested.

I'm gunna finish this and strong. 

Hopefully everything I have been through will shine a light directly to where I want to be.

In the mean time to keep my energy level up, After class tomorrow Ally and I are going bowling =D

I am super excited.. hopefully we can get my car out of it's snowed in parking spot... poor Lola.

2 games, shoes, pizza, soda. $5.00 What a deal. I love good bargains.

See ya 100th blog.. it was nice knowin' ya.

<3 Be Peaceful.

Ain't no sunshine when he's gone

It's snowing and raining and the ground looks gross.
The worst part of snow it1) when it gets disgustingly dirty
2) when it melts into disgustingly dirty slosh
It travels up my dragging un-hemmed chef pants, which then touches my sock since my shoes have no backs which get my socks wet which is the most unbelievable gross feeling.
So here we are again.. Snow day number two of the year
Which is kind of a funny thing since I was told when I first got to the CIA that snow days were extremely few and far between and that this school never closed.
HAHA to who ever decided that because we are on number two snow day and we have had multiple days of getting out early due to weather.
Unfortunately because we do not have school tomorrow... yep you guessed it.. no three day weekend, now we have to make up the day on Monday... BUMMER!
Oh well... I will fill this fine day with a lot of staying inside and video games I hope.
I have lots of hopes lately....and ironically I hope my hopes turn into reality.
Maybe if I am feeling ambitious I will practice for my practical... maybe..

Happy 2nd day of February. This month is gunna go quick, I can feel it.

<3 Be Peaceful

naked.

On February first at 1:12 am I finished one of the best books I have ever read.
So informational, So direct and uncensored.
I might read it again.
 
Thank you Boo.

<3 Be Peaceful