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Sunday, October 31, 2010

I've got a thinkin problem.

Thinking is not good sometimes.
and that fact is extremely frustrating 
because everythingggg makes me think about something
or another.

thoughts lately=
The possibilities of December not being anything I hoping it to be.
Dreads would be really cool to have but..its a hugeee commitment.
I wish I was doing better in school.
What am I gunna do for extern.
What am I gunna do for a career.
Old friends and relationships.
New friends and relationships.
The cold weather being the death of me.
The blocking of music download sites BLOWS.
My new roommate moving in.
Next years roommate choices.
Lack of sleep might kill me.
New chef shoes.
Getting a job.
Not having time for a job(or energy)
Being a hippie bum for the rest of my life.

I could probably go on forever.
ughhh. *sighs*

I just want peacefulness.

I guess if I cant be peaceful you still can so...
<3 be peaceful

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Wishing away the days.

Today.
I am discouraged, tired, and plain frustrated.
Tomorrow.
Is the end of the week,
another week may I add.
The week went fast and it's the weekend again.
I like the weekends,
My stress fades ever so slightly and for a little while I feel like a teenager.
This weekend I'm hoping will be especially fun.
It's Halloween and I'll be spending the weekend with an amazing group of girls.
Hopefully everything works out as planned.


I don't really have much else to say.
I guess I'll end with...
I miss home.
I miss my family.
I miss being somewhere familiar.
I miss my Boyfriend.
I can't wait for the next 56 days to go by.
(I also recognize wishing for the future is sad. I don't like wishing the days away because I know I've done to much of that in the past but...living for today is hard when today is just not that great of a day.)

Thats all...
<3 Be peaceful

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Unhappy.

Today I am less than happy.
I have been really happy lately
but I am tired today
I don't want to be in class anymore today but..
I have 5 more hours of boring to go
I wish these next two days would hurry up and be over with so I can sleep in again
And that will also be 2 days closer to Christmas break which is what I am mainly looking forward to.
Where are you Santa?! hurry up!
It's only Tuesday and I'm already annoyed with this week

58 1/2 days to go(its sad that I'm, counting half days.) 10.10.10 <3

<3 Be Peacful



Sunday, October 24, 2010

Hello World!

It is a beautiful day today!
I have been with Morgan and Ally all day, I also saw Jenny today.
and the cherry on top.. I talked to my lovely boy friend today =DDDDDD (huge smile)
I think I had a heart attack I was so happy. It made my whole year probably.

Anyways tomorrow we are having a girls day.
Ally, Morgan, Krissy, Annelise, and I.
Were gunna look for Halloween costumes!!! =D
SPICE GIRLS HERE WE COMEEEE! YAY!

In other news.
I am very frustrated with the pull between being pleasant to certain people or being true to myself.
I don't feel like I should have to sugar coat things to make others happy.
and in return I don't think people should sugar coat it for me either.
I believe that if you are doing something rude or disrespectful then it should be expressed or taken care of then and there. 
I don't think people should get away with doing rude things.
and I also don't think that "it's the way you were raised" is an excuse.
Ugh. This is weighing on my mind constantly.
Why are you so rude?
Maybe if you weren't so rude to me or in general then I would be nicer to you.

Enough of my venting.
Even with the stress of a new class, the annoyance of rude people, and all of the other what not going on in my life....I am happy.
Really happy actually.
and..I know exactly why <3
60 more days 10.10.10

<3 Be Peaceful



Saturday, October 23, 2010

Appreciate- to be grateful or thankful for, to be fully conscious of...

I feel appreciative of the people around me lately.
I have started to realize that I need to choose the people around me wisely
and that when I find someone I like I need to make an effort to keep them in my life.
As I'm talking about this some people are coming to mind
and I would like to recognize them.
(this may or may not be in order of importance)
Mom- I love you, I can't wait to come home and see you. Thank you for giving me the world.
Alan- Thank you for being so loving and supportive. I love you more than anything. <3 10.10.10
Al- You are truly amazing. I don't know if I have ever had a better friend. I admire and adore you.
Ty- I can't put into words how much you mean to me. You have done the most amazing things for me and you support Alan and I in everything. It means the world. You're one of the most knowledgeable people I know.
Heather and Tanya- Thank you for being such great sisters. I know you would do anything for me and I would do anything for you both. I am glad to have you guys in my life.
Dad- Thanks for makin me. =) I love you even if you make me mad sometimes. Maybe some day I'll admit how much like you I actually am.
Grandma- I love you. Your so supportive and I admire you for your positivity.

I'm positive there are many others that deserve to be in this blog but I only have so much typing space.
I just want to end that I'm happy for all of my new friends as well and for my caring friends back home.
I hope you all stay in my life.

I appreciate the world today. I have a good life, even if I forget that on my bad days.

61 more days 10.10.10

<3 Be peaceful

Friday, October 22, 2010

Your my number one.

Happy =)
Tonight was a really good night.
I hug out with my usual Al (love herrrrr)
and also hung out with Morgan and Krissy and then Annelise joined
Over all it was an amazing night and I laughed more than I have in a while.
I'm glad I have found good friends here and it was hard.
I have to admit I was slightly scared to have to start over
with friendship at least
especially since a lot of my friends back home I've known since kindergarten.
But my friends here are funny and they get me
and that makes my life easier and way more enjoyable
especially since I will be in class with these same people for the next three or so years


Also in this blog I would like to address that my mom totally kirked out when she say my Art school blog
so here is a clarification!
I loveeee baking and this is definitely the industry I want to be in
But I would love to be in the food styling industry which is hard to do without a art background
so me going to culinary school and then art school would make sense
but I still want to bake! baking is my passion
and as someone very knowledgable and important to me once said
"you must have relentless passion" -J.Osborne

In other news...
This week flewwww by and I hope it stays this way
I go into culinary skills on Tues
and I know the first week is going to suck since I'll be pulling 3- 12 hr days in a row but I'll make it
only 62 days left till I go home and see all my loves and my number one love!


<3 be peaceful

recommend song-
Banana pancakes-Jack Johnson (second time cuz its so damn good)

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Cut outs

I cannot believeeeee I am a freshman in college and I'm doing cut outs.
Really I'm not complaining because its easy its just super time consuming
and so is every other assignment I have and I only have so much time!
What is one to do...I KNO! not sleeppppp!
bah ha!

So I have been thinking more and more about this four year plan...
Do I really want to stay here for four years?
A bachelors in baking would be nice but I'm just not sure.
I guess we will wait and see what I decide when the time comes.
Maybe I'll leave her and go to art school. I'm not sure yet.
Either way = a shit ton of money and a shit ton of debt.
Might as well do what I want and enjoy right?

Other not new news...I have finals tomorrow and Friday and it is gunna suck ass and so is going into a new class...its like just when you get comfortable they shuffle you around again.

I just wanna cuddle with my boyfriend  it would make everything a lot better.

Night-

<3 be peaceful

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Tomorrows Doom Day.

I'm not looking forward to tomorrow...tomorrow starts final exams as well as the first day I will no longer get a "good morning" or "I love you"
I feel like i have prepared me self but I know not well enough
Have you ever tried so hard not to think about something that is just consumes your mind?
This has happened to me.
I can't stop thinking about not only the shitty current situation but also what will come of it in the near future and possibly the distant future
Hopefully all will end well.

In other news, (i feel like all i blog about its my stupid love life these days)
I have finals!!! YAY! finally I will be out of baking techniques and equipment
Dont get me wrong this is not a horrible class,
I just don't appriciate it much,
I feel like we should be aloud to test out of it
Next I will trek trough culinary skills which will lead me straight into Breads and hearth roll
and this my friends will all lead me into Christmas break. the thing I am so greatly looking forward too.

more later, its time to do some homework.
<3 be peaceful.

Just like every night has its dawn.

Today was a nice day,
I got to go to the high ropes course which was awesome
I would love to do it again.



This blog is hella old but would not load and soooo..here it is a few days late.
I will add more pictures laterrrr

Friday, October 15, 2010

We could close the curtains, pretend like there's no world outside.

Today I am Happy.
I was a little flustered that I wasted the morning sleeping but I was productive last night as was I tonight so hopefully I made up for it and can finish all my homework in a productive matter this weekend.
I have lots and lots of homework.
it is really unfortunate in fact.

Next week is my last week of my current classes..
I will finally step foot in a kitchen other then to receive my dinner.
but much like my unfortunate homework I will be doing unfortunate culinary skills
knife cuts, hot foods, and learning how to make sandwiches. sounds like a freakin BLAST!
I want to yell at the people who made my schedule...
Don't you knowwww! I picked BAKING for a REASONN!
I suppose I will survive though, I made it through Tech Culinary.
Not saying I'm gunna like it though or that I will not complain.

Anyways, the leaves have continued to change colors 
and it's getting colder by the day.
I'm certain it will snow in the relatively close future
although,
I'm from Florida...What the hell do I know?


Other reasons I am happy today also include but are not limited to..
I have the best Boy friend.(10.10.10)
I have the Best room mate (love you al!)
Al and I went for a wonderful walk today since we got so rudely kicked out of the rec center.
Tomorrow is Saturday. No class.
There is a soccer game tomorrow...GO STEELS!
Sunday I will be going to eat all you can eat pancakes at I-HOP and following my fat fest with a amazing looking rope course adventure.

I know next week is going to be hell...
So I am gunna soak in my happiness as much as I can right now.
Hopefully, I will find some kind of happiness next week
and the week after that
and for the next four weeks after that.
Because then I will be home =) 
I can't wait.

I would like to end this blog with a recommended song-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkyrIRyrRdY

<3 Be peaceful

this seems to be reoccurring.

I'm not telling you it is going to be easy, I'm telling you it's going to be worth it.

I have heard this quote a millions times and yet it still stands strong.
Through my schooling,
Through my extracurricular activities,
Through having a job,
Through my relationships especially.

I hope that things will work themselves out and I will come out on top and happy.
Even though I am over whelmed, stressed, and missing home and my boyfriend. I am happy.
And I'm going to try to stay this way.

<3 Be Peaceful
 

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

I hope your reading this..

I felt giddy today when I closed facebook and saw your face on my desktop.
I cannot believe it was you, live and moving.
I have been staring at your picture for so long it took me by surprise
probably shock to be honest
I felt butterflies, which is not uncommon when it comes to you
You make me the happiest girl alive.
You were worth the wait.

If you ever do or ever did
question how i feel about you..
Hopefully I will clear it up in this blog post.

You mean the world to me.
I have never loved someone as much as I love you.
I would do anything for you,
with out question.
I never thought I would be "in love" 
I thought you just loved someone and that was that, I am in love with you.
With you I smile always.
Even when I'm sad I have a little bit of happy.
that happy is you.
I love your smile, I love your laugh,
I love your manly habits and the way you play with your hair.
I can't think of a single thing I would change about you,
You are PERFECT exactly how you are.
I can't wait for the day your arms will be wrapped around me again.
Every love song reminds me of you,
except I realize we are perfect unlike the people in those songs
If there was ever another half of me, 
it would be you.
I appriciate all the little things you do and the big,
I could say thank you for the rest of my life and it wouldn't be enough
I feel safe with you and comfortable.
They say Home is where your hearts at,
you are my home.
I would go on with this for centuries if I could but I know you,
and your sick of this by now
So...I will end saying

I love you, I'm in love with you 
and I can't wait for forever as long as it's with you.
10.10.10<3

Monday, October 11, 2010

In your heart and your mind, I'll stay with you for all of time.

So lately, I've been wonderin
Who will be there to take my place
When I'm gone, you'll need love
To light the shadows on your face
If a great wave should fall
It would fall upon us all
And between the sand and stone
Could you make it on your own

If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'll go wherever you will go

And maybe, I'll find out
The way to make it back someday
To watch you, to guide you
Through the darkest of your days
If a great wave should fall
It would fall upon us all
Well I hope there's someone out there
Who can bring me back to you
-the calling-wherever you will go


This song played on the way home from breakfast with ally today.
Its been stuck in my head ever since, I guess it kinda hit home today
Unfortunately the days are dwindling down
all I can say is, I hope you miss me the way I already miss you.


In happier news, I of course had pancakes with my darling Al today
It was a wonderful start to the morning,
but i am regretful to say i will most likely be spending the rest of the day on homework
especially if I don't get my ass of blog spot and facebook
but after reading 22 of my 40 pages of boring I'm assigned I deserve a break, right?
More important then this reading(altough without this reading I will not be going)
I have been looking into extern sites which I am very excited about
I have been emailing some really nice bakeries in Canada
and I have been looking into working at Disney back in the lovely Sunshine state
who knows where it will take me....
Better be some place GOOOODDD though!

thats all for now =)

<3 be peaceful

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Happy vs. Sad

I am extremely happy that what I have been waiting for has finally happened.
But I'm really sad that this is the way it has to be.
We don't have the oppurtunity to do it like the rest,
to make it right and normal.
I wish it wasn't so difficult.

why is life so complicated these days?
why can't we be in sixth grade again?

I love you so much<3

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Annoy.

ANNOY: to disturb or bother (a person) in a way that displeases, troubles, or slightly irritates.

This is what I am today. I am annoyed. Which is not that uncommon for me.
I just don't understand the stupid things people do and say.
I don't understand why I have to take a class that teaches me what a rubber spatula is.
I don't understand why everyone has to be in my business.
I don't understand why maintenance thinks its okay to come in my room and slam shit when I'm clearly SLEEPING! 
I'm annoyed when people don't pay attention 
I'm annoyed when people don't listen
Lastly, I don't understand why certain people can't tell when I'm mad at them.

I can't wait for Thanks giving when I will have a week to be by myself. Because fortunately I don't annoy myself.


I wish is was okay to scream curse words out loud at people every time I think they are doing something that is dumb or doing something that's annoying me.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

No diggity.

Today is a good day.
Although I started the day in not the best of moods, my love cheered me up and the day has progressively gotten better.
Also I'd like to say that today I broke the whole "curiosity killed the cat" phrase cause I'm really glad I was wondering and I asked someone a certain question.it ended up not killing me, in fact the outcome was an amazing one.<3 and I think a semi actually killed the cat.
In other news, I'd like to give a shout out to my mother- I love you and miss you, thanks for makin me!
seriously tho, I really miss my mom, I knew I talked to her a lot when I was in FL but you realize it more when you have to call the person to talk instead of walking down the hallway, I can't wait to be home for Christmas 
This is all I have to say for now so I'll end with a really funny quote that you probably wont laugh at because your not cool enough to understand.
"if you had to stare at a Buddha for awhile"-Ally ball  <--best roommate<33333


<3 Be Peaceful

Friday, October 1, 2010

GIRL TALK!

Its currently 5:35 am, I haven't slept yet due to the fact that I went to the girl talk concert and got home at one and decided I would just stay up for my 7 and 9 am exams and the sleep...seemed logical.
So now I'm sitting in my lounge with Morgan and Spencer (whose sleeping) and we are watching music videos and kinda studying.
I am extremely happy that the concert was awesome, not sleeping wasn't that bad, it's Friday, were having a sleep over tonight, my classes are over, and the weekends gunna be awesome.
SHITS DANK!

Time to shower and get ready for classssss!

<3 Be peaceful